So, funny thing...I've been out of communication via DA. However, I've been in complete communication via a new writing/blogging gig and my facebook.

Just to update, long story short, yes I have been working, obviously, posting some late commissions (sorry! and I haven't forgotten a single one of ya!) and commenting on things. However, I've been going through a personal issue for the last 2 weeks.

Through my Sorah Sutra blog, I was able to get a gig writing for a company out here in Los Angeles as a 3-times a week blogger. It's been super fun! The first blog I did was of the sexual nature:

[link]

Then my personal bit came about...I actually am in need of updating my personal pet project that is Sorah Sutra (sorry people! I've GOT the article, just cleaning it up now!). Anyway, but my editor asked me to blog about what I had been going through the last 2 weeks. So I did. And I think it's the quickest way for me to explain what's been going on with me:

[link]

I'm good now. And back on track. <3 But I wanted to answer all of your questions I kept getting via notes. Thank you for all the support xoxo.

-Sorah

Long story as to why this came up and why I decided to do it, but hey I think I make it a fun read!

Check it out: [link]

Let's talk about sex! Share!

--Sorah

EDIT: Feel free to leave comments and suggestions!
EDIT EDIT: NEW POST!

For those of you who do not know what is going on in my life...

1) I have been incredibly busy and doing a lot of work "on spec." While those things are panning out WONDERFULLY, I've got a bit to wait till I get my financial rewards on them.

2) I've been sick for the last 3 weeks (going on 4, I think?). Cascade system failure, it would seem. First I had a tract infection, lasted a week, on the 6th day of it, I got acute food poisoning, which was immediately followed by a sinus infection, which was thusly followed by a cold that has been kicking my ass (I'm still suffering from it), followed by another issue that I can only describe as being private, but it had me freaking out bad (still freaked out) and I need to go get tests done to see wtf is wrong with me in that department.

3) Within me being sick, I haven't been able to work.

4) I just got into a car accident yesterday in an attempt to go see District 9 to forget my woes and worries...life had other plans, clearly. (Long story involving it being THEIR fault, but they are illegal aliens, etc, yeah my life sucks right now.)

5) Due to my mounting medical bills, my inability to work for the last few weeks, and now the car stuff, I'm unbelievably strapped for crash. I'm finally feeling better, other than the need to go get a few more tests to pinpoint the exact issue with me (health-wise), all other ailments seem to be clearing up.

SO! I normally don't take commissions except from specific people with specific things in mind (coloring for Bayani, or a commission here and there if the mood strikes me). However, given the circumstances, I want to be able to make up (financially) for some lost time.

I'm offering a reduced rate on simple character sketches. Normally $75 for a pencil rendering, I'm going to throw it down to $50. They don't take me long and I figure if I get enough of them, it can make up a bit for my bills

ANYWAY! So, yeah...I don't know how this commission thing really works these days or how people announce them, so I figured I would just lay it out there.

(UPDATE: Upon further examination...and a little discussion with a dear friend of mine, we've determined I'm just having a bitchy/moody "woes is me" day...and that if I still feel this way tomorrow, to take me seriously.)

A little vent time.

Something amazing has become clear to me. I am my own worst enemy.

Not in a conventional way where I am killing myself slowly or whatever and need rehab...but in a way that I am self-defeating (unintentionally of course).

In all of my efforts to gain a modicum of respect with people, I have failed miserably, apparently.

It doesn't matter how many times I'm right. It doesn't matter how many people have seen that I've been right. To most people, I'm still a 23 year old fucktard. To their defense, most people my age ARE 23 year old fucktards. In fact, I could list off almost everyone I went to high school with, who has accomplished nothing, being a 23 year old fucktard whose existence looks forwarding to drinking beer with their family on the weekends (...every weekend).

It's as if people forget that I dedicated 2 years of my life to learning my craft (and P.S. I'm STILL learning, just a different skill set now). It's like it doesn't matter that not only did I do that, but I was also going to college (and doing extremely well) at the same time and finishing 4 years worth of credits in a mere 2.

But again, I realize that it's actually ME causing this. Ya see, I'm inherently playful by nature. I love to joke around and have fun and in the same breath have a life-altering discussion about the meaning of life and the fallacy therein. Maybe others can't do that, who knows. But it's the playful part that is clearly the issue.

At this point in my life, I need to make a choice. Playful...or serious so I can be treated like another human being.

I'm kind of tired of being disregarded, chortled at, pushed aside due to my age (+ playfulness). And I think I'm going to start living up to the other stereotype of that Asian girl. Quiet. Thoughtful. Serious.

And maybe after I turn 30, or have several successful ventures under my belt, I can drop the act and go back to my playful self.

So Deuces.

EDIT: I'm not fishing for sympathy here you guys, I was simply venting. This is reality. That's all. Seriously. It's NOT a big deal. So stop saying you're sorry to hear this and what have you.

A part of me misses the freedom that came from being a haughty 20 year old with nothing to lose, where I can could just get online and espouse whatever the hell I damn pleased knowing that I would never have to deal with any consequences. It was cathartic. Unfortunately, I can't really do that anymore. I will be able to again...eventually, whenever I get my art good enough to be established and what not, but...for now...I've been instructed to keep my mouth relatively shut.

Anyway, within that vein, I have been a strange mood swing lately. Listening to a lot of sad country...but I'm not really sad. In fact, if anything, my regular emotional state in the last...couple of weeks? Anger. I've been pretty angry, and it's been only getting worse.

I suppose that's the regular progression of things though. It's because of my knowledge in psychology that I tend to not get involved with people, because I already know why they are fucked up. No one is a mystery to me anymore...I was depressed months ago, now I'm angry, hopefully this part doesn't last as long as the depressed part. Never thought that the death of a minor dream would take over a year to get over.

Well...I suppose we'll see at SDCC. If I'm going to reach a peak of anger...that's gonna be it. Don't ask me how I know. LOL I just do. Which is unfortunate since I'm totally geek-excited to be going this year non-professionally.

I know this is probably not making much sense to any of you, but whatever, it's cathartic. LOL.

I have to go do 2 hours of laundry now. I hope you all have a wonderful day! And don't worry...angry Sorah is a huge step above sad Sorah. Angry Sorah you can make laugh and turn her easily to the happy Sorah

-S